Created

[Ripcord]

In the beginning, God covered the earth with broccoli, cauliflower >and spinach, with green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so >Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives. > > Then, using God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's and >Krispy Kreme. And Satan said: "You want hot fudge with that?" > > And Man said: "Yes!" > And Woman said: "I'll have one, too...with sprinkles." > And lo they gained 10 pounds. > > And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. > > > > And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane, and combined them. And Woman went from size 2 to size 14. > > So God said: "Try my fresh green garden salad." And Satan presented crumbled Bleu Cheese dressing and garlic toast on the side. > > And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast. > > God then said: "I have sent you heart-healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." > > And Satan brought forth deep-fried coconut shrimp, butter-dipped >lobster chunks, and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own >platter. > > And Man's cholesterol went through the roof. > > Then God brought forth the potato; naturally low in fat and brimming >with potassium and good nutrition. > > Then Satan peeled off the healthful skin, sliced the starchy center >into chips and deep-fried them in animal fats adding copious quantities >of salt. > > And Man packed on more pounds. > > God then brought forth running shoes so that his children might lose >those extra pounds. > > And Satan introduced cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. > > And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and >started wearing stretchy lycra jogging suits. > > > God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and >still satisfy his appetite. > > And Satan created McDonald's and the 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then Satan said: "You want fries with that?" > > And Man replied: "Yes! And super size 'em! > > And Satan said: " It is good." > > And Man and Woman went into cardiac arrest. > > God sighed...and created quadruple by-pass surgery. > > Satan chuckled and created HMOs