When insults had class.

[Jim]

When Insults Had Class: These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor:
She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison."
He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."

A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease."
"That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."

"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." - Moses Hadas

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.

"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright

"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." - Irvin S. Cobb

"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." - Samuel Johnson

"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating

"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand

"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker

"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." - Oscar Wilde

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

[Rock Island Ranger]

Well.....if any of us HAD any class we would identify with it however, I doubt any of these knuckledragging neaderthals has clue on what any of the aformentioned meant.



jes sayin........

[panthersix]

Well.....if any of us HAD any class we would identify with it however, I doubt any of these knuckledragging neaderthals has clue on what any of the aformentioned meant.



jes sayin........

Fook YOU! I have master's degree!

[Rock Island Ranger]

Well.....if any of us HAD any class we would identify with it however, I doubt any of these knuckledragging neaderthals has clue on what any of the aformentioned meant.



jes sayin........

Fook YOU! I have master's degree!

Ooooooooooo, I just luv a man with a Masters but I liked you better when I thought you were stupid like the rest of us.

[panthersix]

Well.....if any of us HAD any class we would identify with it however, I doubt any of these knuckledragging neaderthals has clue on what any of the aformentioned meant.



jes sayin........

Fook YOU! I have master's degree!

Ooooooooooo, I just luv a man with a Masters but I liked you better when I thought you were stupid like the rest of us.

I do have a BA in Multiple Choice (AKA Criminal Justice), I was just too pussy to become a LEO...

[Invictus]

Being a big fan of the well developed vocabulary, I thought these were pretty damn funny.
As far as class goes...well, lets not get carried away.

[DrD]

Well.....if any of us HAD any class we would identify with it however, I doubt any of these knuckledragging neaderthals has clue on what any of the aformentioned meant.



jes sayin........

Fook YOU! I have master's degree!

Ooooooooooo, I just luv a man with a Masters but I liked you better when I thought you were stupid like the rest of us.

[502in62]

I have a daughter with a masters degree. Smarts 100, Common Sense 0.

[DrD]

I have a daughter with a masters degree. Smarts 100, Common Sense 0.

Well... nobody's perfect. But, having said that... a master's is a wonderful accomplishment. You must be very proud of her. :D

Shana

[panthersix]

I have a daughter with a masters degree. Smarts 100, Common Sense 0.

Well... nobody's perfect. But, having said that... a master's is a wonderful accomplishment. You must be very proud of her. :D

Shana

So you're not proud of me too?

[502in62]

I have a daughter with a masters degree. Smarts 100, Common Sense 0.

Well... nobody's perfect. But, having said that... a master's is a wonderful accomplishment. You must be very proud of her. :D

Shana

Very proud. She inherited the 0 from her father.

[DrD]

Well... nobody's perfect. But, having said that... a master's is a wonderful accomplishment. You must be very proud of her. :D

Shana

So you're not proud of me too?

Yes, Ranger panthersix... I am very proud of you too.

Shana

[DrD]

I have a daughter with a masters degree. Smarts 100, Common Sense 0.

Well... nobody's perfect. But, having said that... a master's is a wonderful accomplishment. You must be very proud of her. :D

Shana

Very proud. She inherited the 0 from her father.

Hhhhmmmm... I see your sig line. 0 may have come from the cosmic mosh of whatever, but it wasn't from you. You could not have done what you did with 0 common sense. :D

Shana

[Go_Placidly]

"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain

Haha, good stuff Ranger Jim. The above is my favorite.

[Rabbit]

Wow, we just learned about Disraeli today...ironic.