Need Advice!

31B_Soldier · Post by **31B_Soldier** » August 12th, 2007, 6:38 am

Ok, where to start.

Recently, I had a ...visitor...who decided to take up residence in my room. (Our rooms are 4 to a room, with a 6 ft wall between, so 2 to a room).

This "visitor" is a vile creature known as a cat. Since I am currently in ownership of a 3 ft blowdart gun with 10 inch spearhead darts, normally this wouldnt be an issue. The only problem...I cant find the fucker. But I can hear him all day and all night.

The two who live across the wall, they are on leave with the door locked. but I can still jump over the wall if need be.

Any advice on how to get rid of/kill the little bastard? Ive torn apart the room trying to find it, and it mocks me with its evil cat cries of jihad all night and all day. I am tempted to let it just start to death, a fitting end for the bastard, but since I cant find it, the end result of a dead rotting cat hidden somewhere aint appealing.

Any advice? and a case (yes, a full case) of a beer of your choice (the day I hit stateside in Apr) to the man who has the winning idea that lets me kill this little monster.

GoldCoast · Post by **GoldCoast** » August 12th, 2007, 8:41 am

I know cats aren't everyone's favorite creature, but I feel that it should be pointed out here that Iraqi cats aren't like American cats - they're survivors. That means they eat bugs (including camel spiders), mice, rats, etc. As long as it's not going to the bathroom in your abode, then I would leave it be. I'd rather have a cat than a camel spider running around my area.

Of course, if you still feel the need to kill it lure it out with some food (probably the reason it's in your area in the first place) and kill however you like. I don't recommend discharging your weapon on the fob, so outside of that a nice heavy rock should do the trick. Practice hitting a cat sized target from ten feet a few times to make sure you're ready and then go for it.

Horned Toad · Post by **Horned Toad** » August 12th, 2007, 9:02 am

A little pussy is better than no pussy

If the thing eats bugs and stuff I would leave it. I know I about shit one time when my favorite barn cat ate a tarantula. I think American outdoor cats eat more stuff than people think.

42L5V · Post by **42L5V** » August 12th, 2007, 9:35 am

Fuck it - tie it to the back of your hummer and drag it. Once you get off the FOB, shoot it with the MK 19 because it repeatedly failed to heed warnings to maintain a safe distance away from the convoy.

GoldCoast · Post by **GoldCoast** » August 12th, 2007, 10:15 am

I can't believe the Pastor hasn't already chimed in on this one...

BruteForce · Post by **BruteForce** » August 12th, 2007, 12:03 pm

Well, being a cat owner myself, I would agree that allowing it to live would be sage advice. Cats are awesome at cleaning up any vermin (spiders, bugs, etc) in your abode.

If however you decide that death should be the only conclusion, get a small tuna can, leave it out and he will surface (if he can) fairly quickly to investigate/eat said Tuna.

31B_Soldier · Post by **31B_Soldier** » August 12th, 2007, 1:55 pm

Ok, I should clarify a bit. I dont neccessarily want to kill it, just to get it out. There are only 3 reasons for this.
(1) damned thing has been meowing up a storm all night and all day for 3 full days now.
(2) It uses my roommates side of the room as a litterbox...never can catch him doing it but always find the crap...ahh story of the life of a Spc....always finding crap
(3) my roommate is semi-allergic to them (I didnt know you could be semi-allergic, but he is, hes got a profile for it and everything...a profile to stay away from cats...wtf)

As long as the cat stops meowing, I dont care where it lives, it can live under my bed for all I care but for the past 3 nights, (its already 0100 now, so 4 nights) I have stayed awake, eventually going to sleep outside. It gets old and mosquitos sucks!

Thanks to all the Rangers for your opinions though.

And Ranger 42L5V, my company isnt allowed to mount the Mark 19 b/c our commander is a moron who ND'ed the 19 first day in country on...ON....Fob Sykes. So our BC said no more 19s, 50's and below only :(

42L5V · Post by **42L5V** » August 12th, 2007, 3:18 pm

31B_Soldier wrote:And Ranger 42L5V, my company isnt allowed to mount the Mark 19 b/c our commander is a moron who ND'ed the 19 first day in country on...ON....Fob Sykes. So our BC said no more 19s, 50's and below only :(

And he's still in command? I relieved a gunner for shooting 3 rounds of a M249 into a loading berm...

Darksaga · Post by **Darksaga** » August 12th, 2007, 8:58 pm

Sounds like a black op mission for the Pastor.

31B_Soldier · Post by **31B_Soldier** » August 13th, 2007, 3:15 am

Roger Ranger 42L5V,

Hes still in command....naturally we call him Capt America cause hes great at saving his own ass, and thinks hes Gods Gift to the American Army.
Dont ask me how the hell he kept his command....had I done that I probably would be an E-1 making nothing...

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » August 13th, 2007, 8:25 am

31B_Soldier wrote:Ok, I should clarify a bit. I dont neccessarily want to kill it, just to get it out. There are only 3 reasons for this.
(1) damned thing has been meowing up a storm all night and all day for 3 full days now.

Follow the meow.

(2) It uses my roommates side of the room as a litterbox...never can catch him doing it but always find the crap...ahh story of the life of a Spc....always finding crap
(3) my roommate is semi-allergic to them (I didnt know you could be semi-allergic, but he is, hes got a profile for it and everything...a profile to stay away from cats...wtf)

Who cares if it's your room mate who has to deal with the cat's poop and hair?

As long as the cat stops meowing, I dont care where it lives, it can live under my bed for all I care but for the past 3 nights, (its already 0100 now, so 4 nights) I have stayed awake, eventually going to sleep outside. It gets old and mosquitos sucks!

You can always lay some food out and feed the thing a little bit. It's probably pissed off that it got the hadji ticket in life.

Thanks to all the Rangers for your opinions though.

And Ranger 42L5V, my company isnt allowed to mount the Mark 19 b/c our commander is a moron who ND'ed the 19 first day in country on...ON....Fob Sykes. So our BC said no more 19s, 50's and below only :(

Did you ever think of changing units?

Rock Island Ranger · August 13th, 2007, 9:09 am

I cant believe you even came on this board and asked the question....
My son, (using my best Pastorial voice), not ALL Cats need killen. In fact, only the ones I come into contact with. But if the little motherfucker is eating vermin.....here is my loving advise...

Ear plugs. Now shut the fuck up or burn your building down.

ANGRYCivilian · Post by **ANGRYCivilian** » August 13th, 2007, 10:41 am

Is the cat stuck on the other side? If you can't, find a Private who can break into the room and get the cat out of there. Feed him outside and keep him around to thin out the vermin.

Question:

If the Muslim cat meows to an American cat, will they understand each other?

GoldCoast · Post by **GoldCoast** » August 13th, 2007, 11:40 am

Abell9 wrote:I cant believe you even came on this board and asked the question....
My son, (using my best Pastorial voice), not ALL Cats need killen. In fact, only the ones I come into contact with. But if the little motherfucker is eating vermin.....here is my loving advise...

Ear plugs. Now shut the fuck up or burn your building down.

AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!

I was waiting for that. I almost spit gatorade on my lap top....