How's Married Life?

ANGRYCivilian · Post by **ANGRYCivilian** » February 4th, 2005, 9:10 am

Rangers and Ranger Wives,

How's married life? I already searched, found one post from some asshole who was banned, and as a result, contained no real info.

I'd like to know if any of you have marriages that work, and how? From personal experience, it seems marriage+army=divorce. It must be worse in highspeed, always deployed units; but, at the same time, there are probably a few that actually work. That is what I am interested it.

Thanks,

ac

Rock Island Ranger · February 4th, 2005, 9:25 am

I guess this is a good question though most don't really want to talk about it. Today is the 27th Anniversary of my marriage.

I think the problem is, men get married too young and women expect white picket fences, sex, yatzi, and long meaningful conversations. In the beginning Im not sure I was in love per se, but I did like her and respect her and that was a mutual thing. The love part, past the lust grew as time went on. Some tough times....very tough times.

I think both of us realized that we had a role to play in life, and no matter what else, respected the other and had absolute confidence in the other to do the right thing for the right reasons. In the tough times we hung in there out of sheer loyalty. I can tell you thi. Marriage is harder work than any task I have ever taken on.
If there is any doubt you both undertstand what you face in the future, don't do it.

Ranger2 · Post by **Ranger2** » February 4th, 2005, 9:46 am

Having had a failed marriage I would say respect is one of the most important aspects of marriage. If you don't respect the other person in the end it will fail.

Ranger2

ANGRYCivilian · Post by **ANGRYCivilian** » February 4th, 2005, 10:10 am

Thanks for the replies, Rangers. My first was a F-ing disaster, and something that I wish was never a part of my life. I am currently married, and it is good. I am wondering how the stress of the Regiment plays on the relationship between Rangers and their wives. Id'd ask ProudRangerWife, but her husband seems to be in RIP, or somewhere close.

Thanks,

ac

Ranger2 · Post by **Ranger2** » February 4th, 2005, 10:16 am

Ranger2

ANGRYCivilian · Post by **ANGRYCivilian** » February 4th, 2005, 10:53 am

Ranger2,

That is along the lines of what I was thinking was going on with the marriages that work, not only in Bat, but throughout RA. Granted, some remf's have never deployed anywhere, and go to the field like 10 days a year; their RA life is similiar to civ-life. I 'deploy' to IT conferences and do some contract work around FL, sometimes gone for 3-4 days; when I come home, we are happy to see each other.

ac

Earthpig · Post by **Earthpig** » February 4th, 2005, 11:20 am

Although I'm on Number 3, we've been married for 20 years. We were hitched throughout much of my LE career and all of my military career. Bat life was stressful for her, no doubt, but it certainly wasn't the roughest part of our marriage. If you have a good woman and a solid relationship with her, it's not going to affect anything. She will worry when you're gone, but who wouldn't?
RLTW
EP

ANGRYCivilian · Post by **ANGRYCivilian** » February 4th, 2005, 12:27 pm

Roger that, Ranger EP.

Thanks.

Proud Ranger Wife · Post by **Proud Ranger Wife** » March 5th, 2005, 8:55 pm

Sorry I am so late in responding to this - I usually don't read this forum and was a little surprised when I saw my "name." My husband has been in BN for close to a year now. We have been married going on six, were together for six years before we got married.

I can tell you that I feel we have an advantage (if you can call it that) over others because we were together so long before he went into BN and it was a mutual decision for him to join the Army and try to make it to BN. I've seen marriages here fall apart when they married after the guy made it to BN. I would think it would be much harder on us if we were recently married and he was gone so much with training, etc. in our first year(s) of marriage. On the flip side, I know of a few couples who married after he joined and then had problems AFTER he got out of BN because they weren't used to actually spending time together. Go figure!

I don't think BN makes it difficult to have a good relationship as long as both of you have realistic expectations. There's challenges in every marriage that have to be overcome. It is what you make it, no matter what career your spouse may choose.

PRW