A pilot and ground control

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A pilot and ground control

Post by Maggot275 »

A Pan-Am 727 flight waiting for clearance in Munich

Lufthansa (in German): 'Ground, what is our start clearance time?'
Ground (in English): 'If you want an answer you must speak in English.'
Lufthansa (in English now): 'I am a German pilot, flying a German aircraft, in Germany. Why must I speak in English?'

Out of nowhere, an unknown voice from another craft in a British accent stated: 'Because you lost the bloody War!'


At the Frankfurt Inernational Airport, Ground control was getting frustrated with a British Airways 747.

Ground: 'British Speedbird 206 taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven.'
The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.
Ground: 'Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?'
Speedbird 206: 'Stand by Ground, I'm looking up our gate location now.'
Ground:(with an arrogant impatience) Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?'
Speedbird 206: (calmly) 'Yes, twice in 1944. But it was dark and I didn't land.'
Attack CO 2/75 01/94-12/98
Ranger Class 08-95

I then asked the Lord: "Why was there only one set of footprints?"
He answered: "The terrain was beginning to constrict and our hit time was coming close. So I put us in a Ranger file."


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Re: A pilot and ground control

Post by K.Ingraham »

Those have long been two of my favorites. Along those lines is the tale of the elderly American tourist trying to pass customs at Orly International in Paris:

When the French customs officer gave the tourist crap about not having his visa ready "Have you not ever entered another nation, you should know to have your visa ready"
"Bud," says the old man, "yes. I visited France before. and when I landed at Omaha, there weren't any Frenchmen waiting to check my visa."
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2d Bn U.D. for 75th Ranger Regt Assn

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Re: A pilot and ground control

Post by Ranger Ron »

"Not a Frenchman in sight!" Never is......

Nice post, I hope you don't mind but I stole it and passed it along.
SUA SPONTE - "We few, we happy few, we BAND OF BROTHERS;
for he today that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother!"
- Shakespeare

RLTW! - Land of the Free BECAUSE of the Brave

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I Co., 75th. Inf.
4/9 Inf., 25th ID

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Re: A pilot and ground control

Post by mortar_guy78 »

Awesome. I am definitely stealing those.
HHC 4/64 AR '97-'99
HHC 1/75 RGR '99-'01
HHC 1/508 ABCT '01-'04
C co, HHC 2/1 IN '04-'07
C co, B co 1/24 IN '07-'11
D co 308th MI '12-'15
7th SFG(A) MICO '15-'18
C co 308th MI '18-Present

Keep your mind in hell and despair not.


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