Doc Burns

Doc Burns · Post by **Doc Burns** » January 27th, 2006, 12:44 am

Gather 'round Cherries and I'll tell you a tale
'Bout an Airborne Ranger who's bad as hell!
Now I'm a mean mutherfucker and I ain't lyin'
I'm a badassed killer and I don't mind die'n.
I don't claim to work and I don't claim to slave,
Fuckin' and fightin' is all I crave.
I blast all day and I fuck all nite,
And when I'm feelin' low I pick me a fight.

So there I was on a payday nite,
Loaded with cash a feelin' light.
I found me a bar and I bopped in the door
Lookin' for some whiskey and a nasty ole whore.
I found me a table and tried me some gamblin'
But that's when I realized I shoulda kept ramblin'.
"Cause standing between me and the only door
Was a nasty-ass leg and he was talkin' to my whore!

He turned to me with a terrible growl and spit.
"You Airborne Rangers don't show me shit!"
"Your Daddy's a pimp and your Momma's a whore"
"I know that's a fact 'cause I fucked her before!"

It then that I realized this sight I'd seen
Was a scumbag shit they call a "Marine."
So with my fast, hard fist I hit him in the nuts
And he fell to the floor with my boot in his guts.

He realized that Ranger was my name
So he decided to throw some shit in the game.
He pulled out a blade and made a pass,
But that's when he realized he was in the wrong class.
'Cause I broke off a bottle and stepped to the rear
And when he went past, I sliced off his ear!
Those whores looked at me with the utmost surprise,
They couldn't believe it when when I gouged out an eye.

By now this fella's face was really fucked up.
He looked like an abortion from a nasty ole slut.
With his last gasping, dying breath they heard hm say,
"From this BAD MUTHERFUCKER drag me away,
And all you living go out and tell
AIRBORNE RANGERS ARE BAS AS HELL!!"

Doc Burns reporting into the net. (I stole that tale from Steve Cornelius, also an original Charlie Company 2nd Batt Ranger)
RLTW!

Doc Burns

centermass · Post by **centermass** » January 27th, 2006, 1:01 am

Good shit right there.

Welcome Ranger.

Nothing like another FOG to keep things balanced.

VAK · Post by **VAK** » January 27th, 2006, 1:30 am

Now Steve's a bit ate up but he's alright. You'll see him around here and I am sure he'll be glad to see one of his Brother's coming around. He just happens to be hanging out this week in my AO.

So, maybe I can get him to teach that one to me.

Welcome to ArmyRanger.com...

Slowpoke · Post by **Slowpoke** » January 27th, 2006, 1:55 am

Welcome youngster.

RangerBob275 · Post by **RangerBob275** » January 27th, 2006, 2:16 am

Welcome Doc

Bob

Chiron · Post by **Chiron** » January 27th, 2006, 4:02 am

Welcome to ArmyRanger.com Doc.

IDon'tCare · Post by **IDon'tCare** » January 27th, 2006, 4:30 am

Welcome.

Gordo173 · Post by **Gordo173** » January 27th, 2006, 4:53 am

Welcome, nice intro

RTO · Post by **RTO** » January 27th, 2006, 5:26 am

Welcome Doc!

DixieRat · Post by **DixieRat** » January 27th, 2006, 5:41 am

About time you got your tired as in here, Doc!

PM inbound.

msg_dman · Post by **msg_dman** » January 27th, 2006, 6:03 am

Welcome

Rock Island Ranger · January 27th, 2006, 6:04 am

Welcome Doc. Some of you will noti9ce that Doc and I went to the same Ranger Class. He pointed it out on another site. Yes, the class right before the Continental Army took on the Hessians....assholes.

Earthpig · Post by **Earthpig** » January 27th, 2006, 6:30 am

Welcome aboard, Doc!
RLTW
EP

Jim · Post by **Jim** » January 27th, 2006, 7:51 am

Abell9 wrote:Welcome Doc. Some of you will noti9ce that Doc and I went to the same Ranger Class. He pointed it out on another site. Yes, the class right before the Continental Army took on the Hessians....assholes.

The Pastor and Doc are recent graduates. The aggressors for my class were French and Indians.